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Xoco's Diary - 2009

May 14, 2009

It is sooooooooooo boring today. It is cloudy and too cool to play outside, so I am forced to "rest" on the desk. I tried sitting on the keyboard as it is warmer than the surface of the desk, but found it difficult to type. So I am dictating to mother.

No crazy person sightings today, but I do have a play date with Nola. She is an eight month old Wheaton terrier that is wild like me. Nola will come to my house and we will rumpus in the rumpus room. Nola is quite small for a Wheaton, only about 25 pounds, so I can take her. Cotton thinks Nola is hot. So hot he forgot to pee while on our walk and ended up exploding in the house right in front of mother. I was so upset I went and hid behind the leg of the plant stand.

Bread and Butter Bill is coming home tomorrow. Reilly says she is so angry she could spit (she does not like it when her daddy is away) . He has been gone much too long!

Reilly is becoming my best girl friend after Murphy and Nola. She plays with me 2-3 minutes a day now. I wish I was tall and thin like Reilly. She is so pretty. Mother says it is what is on the inside that counts, but I hate looking like a sponge mop.

X

May 15, 2009

It was a much better day today. The sun came out and I spent three hours outdoors with Cotton and Reilly. We sun bathed and dug holes and I ate worms. Worms are so delicious. I don't know why I can't have them for dinner every night.

The oak tree is blossoming and dropping its funny flowers everywhere. I eat these too. The oak pollen makes Reilly's eyes run - she looks so funny with puffy eyes and goopy cheeks. Mother gave her a cherry flavored Benadryl. If her eyes are still swollen and runny after a night on Benadryl, she has to go to the vet. Reilly is not pleased. When mother called the vet, the receptionist said "which one is in trouble now?". That is not the reputation we wish to have in the household.

Today mother started making a garden for our friend Miss D . Miss D weighs maybe 20 pounds more than me. She is so little and old that she needs a lot of help. We are edging her flower beds and then planting tomatoes and herbs in pots that are easy for her to water and reach. Yesterday we made cookies for Miss D and her granddaughters. The granddaughters stayed with Cotton and Reilly while I was on vacation. They are so nice and of course love me.

J, the three year old across the street, is my new best friend today. I like her. her lap is just the right size for me. I curled up in it and cuddled her gently. J just giggled with delight. She wants me to live at her house. I am thinking about it.....

Tonight Free Range Bill returns. I hope he does not make me sleep in the box. I LOVE the big bed.

X

May 16, 2009

My mothered smelled like a dead cat. It was the best smell I have ever smelled in my whole life. I just followed her everywhere, just to get a whiff of dead kitty.

My mother got to go to a swamp and clean out garbage for two hours. She did not take any of us, which I think was highly unjust! First five minutes there, she found the dead feline. She said it was all maggoty and she could not even pick it up and put it in a bag because it was too far gone. Dang. I wish she had brought it home. That would have been the best tug toy ever. Instead she just absorbed the smell of swamp rot and dead cat. She also found two dead skunks and several dead fish, but I long to see the dead kitty.

Reilly's eye looks mucho better today. Benadryl did the trick. She gets cherry medicine twice a day until the oak tree stops making its mess. She did not have to go to the vet either. She is lucky. And a little bit nicer on Benadryl too.

Senor Bill came home last night. I like him. Reilly got to go to pick him up with mother. About 2 miles from home, mother's clutch cable went. ACK! Never fear, Bill was here. He got them home by starting the car in first without a clutch and then a big tow truck came and took the chuck wagon to the fix it store this morning. The tow truck man said "have a better day" to FRB as he pulled away. Mother already had an appointment scheduled for Tuesday for an oil change - this will just be a very expensive oil change! I hope the chuck wagon comes home soon. I do not think I am allowed in Senor Bill's good car. Maybe if I ride in my bag I can go.

After playing with the dead cat, mother finished helping Miss D in her garden. It looks really nice and we can see Miss D keeping going outside and admiring it. Maybe we will put a pot of flowers together for her as well. Flowers that smell like a dead cat would be nice.

I wish I had a dead cat.

X

May 17, 2009

Today is school day. I am really the smallest kid in class now. How come I can be the smartest and the smallest? I come when called, I sit when mother says it or gives me the sign for it. I don't like down, but I will do it for cheese. And I do a fabulous sit stay. We graduate in two weeks. I might need a new dress for the occasion.

Reilly got to go in Bill's extra nice car to Petco and Trader Joes. LUCKY! I did get to ride in his car to class and back, but was so nervous I stayed on mother's lap mostly.

Cotton got an alone walk in the park with mother. LUCKY! I got a walk with Reilly. I am having a hard time remembering to poop when outside, so mother thinks Reilly will set an good example for me. There is simply too much to see and smell and pick up to be bothered with pooping. Mother says she is exasperated with me. We walked for an hour yesterday and I pooped in the living room when we got home. I like pooping in the living room. It is a nice space that we do not use enough as a family. Lots of privacy too. Father says he may have to wring my neck next time.......

x

May 18, 2009

Mondays are so exhausting. I never have any fun on Mondays as I have to catch up on my sleep from the weekend.

Our friend John has been here, so that makes me even more weary. One more lap to sit in and one more face to lick. Plus I have to clean up and make his bed for him, which is very hard. I just can't get the linens all straight and tidy. Dusting is a breeze for me however - I just roll over the surfaces.

Reilly still has goopy eyes. As long as she gets Benadryl three times a day, she is okay. But we think she rubbed her right eye too much yesterday (she rubbed her eyes a lot yesterday) and got a little wound in it. Mother put a drop of eye medicine in it and it looks all better.

Senor Bill had to call Australia at 3 am this morning. That too interrupted our sleep. He was on the phone for 1 1/2 hours and then went back to bed for an hour. Now he looks all dopey too.

The car fix it store is working on mother's car. They have not called yet, but we are hoping it will be done today. I need it to go shopping for a graduation dress.

Just had a walk. I better nap before my dinner.

X

May 19, 2009

Today I helped mother in the park. We had to remove a patch of Japanese Knot weed. It is an invasive. It takes about ten years to kill one plant. So every spring mother goes to the park with her friend Mary and they pull out knotweed plants. I helped. I dug holes in the dirt. I barked at other dogs. I got tangled up in my leash. I chewed on sticks. I got tangled up in my leash again. I ran around in circles. And I barked some more. Boy am I exhausted now.

Reilly's eyes are just about clear now. The pollen seems much lighter today. Even Cotton was getting itchy eyes. There were other dogs in the park today that also had runny eyes, so the pollen has been bad for everyone.

Free Range Bill (FRB) worked all day at his desk. His office is a maze of piles right now. I like it. I can sit on top of a pile and be 4 inches taller. Mother is not pleased. Cotton likes it. He can grab a paper off the top of a pile and shred it in under 10 seconds. Bill is not pleased.

The Chuck Wagon will come home tomorrow. The car fix it man had to special order a part. That sounds expensive! But he said it is covered by the warranty, which is a good thing. I wonder if I have a warranty. Since it is a good thing, maybe I should get one.

X

May 20, 2009

I have just been too busy to write. I am the hostess with the mostest. The mostest kisses and licks that is!

Our friend Carol is here. I like her. She is funny. She and Bill and Ellen sat outside on the porch and talked, so I got to eat dirt and play in the mulch. Cotton ate million year old green beans mother had throw out ages ago for the squirrels. They looked like worms. I love worms.

I am still pooping in the house. Mother says I really must learn to budget my time better or I will not be allowed on next year's calendar. That got my attention - I have pooped outside twice today.

Miss D , across the street, lives in a two family house. The couple on the second floor have the yucky H1N1 flu. The wife teaches in Boston public schools and probably got it at school. Now we are all worried about tiny Miss D . She has a bad heart and very bad asthma, so if she gets a bad flu bug, it is very hard on her. She just found out today and has been washing all of the door handles and keeping her hands clean. Me and mother have instigated " Miss D Watch" to keep an eye on things.

It got so hot here yesterday - 91 in Harvard Square. Dang, I hate all this hair when it is hot. Mother says she will shave me and then I can look like a real Chihuahua! I may have to take her up on that. Reilly LOVES, LOVES, LOVES this heat. She sat outside in the direct sun light for three hours yesterday. And she tried to lie down in the middle of the hot road on our walk just to get more heat! She is crazier than me. The pond man put nasty chemicals in the pond yesterday to kill the pond weed (and bugs and fish and harm small dogs) so no one can swim right now either. Mother says she will get our pool out today. I am so excited!!!!! I get to swim naked.

X

May 21, 2009

Xoco is tired little girl. I am just too busy to nap as needed. I get up at 6:30 and poop and pee like a big girl outside. Then I eat breakfast. Today I went back to sleep until 9:30 or later. I was still in bed when mother came into the room to find three dogs to go on a walk. We did get up and go to the hardware store. Then back at the ranch I played outside all day long. I ate sticks and dug holes and played with the kids across the street, and read with Senor Bill on the porch and chased a bird in the grass. There is just too much to do.

Now Xoco is very weary. Mother says we must go on a walk and I must poop outside. We'll see.........

X

May 22, 2009

I pooped on the evening walk tonight. I am such a BIG girl now.

I am tired. I am going to sleep under the bed until Free Range Bill (FRB) and mother come to bed.

Good night good doggies

X

May 24, 2009

Ugh. I hate little sisters.

They are so gross.

Everyone stops and says "she is so cute!!!!!! What kind of dog is she? Oh, I want one!". Do you have any idea of how horrible she is?!!? She POOPS IN THE HOUSE!!!!! All of the time. I have not set one precious paw in the living room for four weeks now because I am afraid of stepping in puppy poo. It is just so gross. Cotton is bad enough, but Xoco is something else completely. And my parents do not know what kind of dog she is anyway! Xoco can not ever join any dog club because she was found on the streets and she does not fit any description of any known type of dog - if she even is a dog! All of this time and money spent on her could have gone to singing lessons for me! The only good thing is Xoco does entertain Cotton, so I have more free time to dream about my next true love.

Speaking of true love, has Manny R ever been a big disappointment. I have removed all of his photos from my bedroom wall and will not even say his name out loud. Anyway, I have grown beyond him. I think J. T . is my real true love. Sigh.

Sgt Princess Smilin' Jack Reilly Reed, TD, FX

May 25, 2009 (Xoco's first Memorial Day)

I am so tired, I did not even beg during the cook out. Why is there so much to do every day? I spent two hours playing in the dirt. I think this might be my favorite thing to do. I also took two very long walks. I think walks are my favorite thing to do. Cotton and I had a major wrastle on the bed. Wrastling Cotton may be my favorite thing to do. I curled up with mother for 15 minutes. Naps in the sunshine may be my favorite thing to do. I had 1/3 of a pig ear to chew. Pig ear chewing may be my favorite thing to do. We visited friends who have two dogs. Visiting friends may be my favorite thing to do. And I discovered squirrels.. Squirrel may become my favorite thing to chase.

It was a long eventful day. I pooped outside twice, so far....

Cotton is having separation anxiety every time mother goes somewhere. It is making Bill a little nuts. He cries the minute mother leaves the room. Cotton and I have to go get Lyme shots tomorrow (Reilly already got her's). I wonder if there is tequila in these shots. And do we get Lemon shots next year? I might be cranky tomorrow, mother said. I hope I am not as cranky as Reilly gets!!!!!!!

Xoco Loco

May 26, 2009

Well that was not what I expected. I thought a shot was something you drank in one gulp. Nope. I am one disappointed Mexican! IT HURT! I was very brave and did not let them see me cry, but that sucked! And I have to go back in two weeks for another one.

Cotton had his physical. He was so nervous that he sat stone still on the table. Dr L liked that - it made the examination easy. Cotton got a Lyme shot too and he cried and made mother hold him like a big baby. Cotton is very needy right now. Mother just loves him up and that makes his tail wag.

I got up at 6 and went to the door. Mother took me out and I pooped. Good girl Xoco. Mother was not crazy about the early hour. She and FRB went out late last night to the South End to bid farewell to Bacio and his parents. They are moving back to Mexico City this week. Mother said that Bacio was so confused when he saw her that he sat right down on the sidewalk and just stared. Then he jumped all over her. They went to a wine bar and sat and talked. Bacio got to go too, but he wasn't allowed to drink either. He is so lucky to get to go to my mother land.

I really must get outdoors now and work on my dirt project.

X

June 8, 2009

Mother says I am a failure and I will never amount to anything. I walk the longs walks and keep up. I play cute games. I chew sticks. So what if I poop in the house!??Z! The 2 year olds twins across the street still have to wear diapers. Mother says perhaps we should have a day camp for all of the "babies". I am NOT a baby. I am just very busy.

Bijou came over. She squealed when I bounced up to say hello. It was funny. I hope she does it again.

Our house guest is afraid of me. I jumped in her lap and slipped her the tongue early on in her stay. She squealed too, come to think of it.

I may not be house broken, but I make others squeal - this could be a good thing.

Falling asleep now. Xzzzzzzzzz

June 9, 2009

Well that just sucked! The only time I get to go in the car with mother alone is when we go to school or the vet. Today it was the vet for my second lime vaccine (I am over expecting tequila and facing reality now). Yup, a big one for the littlest girl right in the old hide. I swear I am going to bite someone if I have to have one more.

And it is raining, so I can not even work on my project as I just melt in water. All of this rain has made puddles and I am forced to leap over each and every one of them. I wonder if Bijou has a set of rubber boots small enough for me. I hate wet feet. Bill put me in a fountain with a whole 2 inches of water Sunday and I was furious and somewhat stuck as I had to walk through the water to get to dry land.

I weigh 7.4 pounds today. I guess that is good. Mother says we may have to watch my diet. This is not what a girl, who just had a lime shot and no tequila, does not want to hear! I may just poop in the house this afternoon to teach them a lesson.

X

June 10, 2009 - Cotton's Take

I love my little sister. She is so way cute. When I get tired of her, I roll on top of her and pin her down. Or I climb under the covers on the bed. But most of the time I play with her.

Today she got a vaccination. She does not feel so good. While mama (I love my mama so much) cleaned the house (and tried to get the perfume smell out of the place that was making us all sneeze) I played real good with Xoco. Mama took a photo. I am a happy boy. I played extra nice today since she had her vaccination. Even Reilly has been nicer to her, mostly.

Cotton ball Reed

June 11, 2009

I am grounded.

Mother found my stash.

I had a sweet collection of six tiny dried out poops under the sofa. I checked on them daily and added to the collection as needed. Mother can not understand how I can poop in such a tight space, but she did not know that I worked in a Mexican circus as a contortionist before coming to live here. I crossed the border hidden in a 4 inch square box and only surfaced when we hit Roswell. But that is another story.

So now we are in lock down. I must be by an adult at all times. I am locked into the pantry when mother leaves. There is a fence across the doorway to the living room. Gates are locked at the top and bottom of the stairs, depending on what floor I am on with my guard. Cotton is now carrying an automatic assault rifle in case I make a break for it. And I have been stripped of all of my gold stars.

I hate my life. I am going to go and pout in a very small and dark space.

Sad, sad Xoco

June 12, 2009

Sigh.

I hate pooping outside. It is such a bother. I have so much else I would rather do like eat sticks and dig in the dirt, but I do get a treat every time I poop. So now I poop 3 or 4 tiny poops to get as many treats as possible. I also pee frequently and have jaunty way of holding one foot up, just like Reilly. Walks take forever now. Mother gets annoyed after we have all had our 19th pee in 2 blocks.

I hate getting locked up too. My cell contains my tiny bed, water bowl, a couple of toys and a window that is up too high for me to see anything. I hope my sentence gets reduced for good behavior.

X


June 13, 2009

I am being a very, very good girl.  I have pooped outside three days in a row!  that is a record for me.  But I am still grounded.  Locked up in the pantry every time mother leaves.  I did sneak into the big bed last night and made myself as adorable as possible so I could stay.  I can be so cute with my tiny head resting on a pillow and my tiny paws curled under my chin.  Hard to resist.

It got "humid" today. I don't know that word, but it makes my hair all crazy.  I look like I have bed head over my entire body.  I have had to be hosed off in the sink twice for collecting debris on my belly.  I can't help that I am low rider and stuff sticks to my unmanageable hair!!!!!!!


Mother bought me two dresses at Build A Bear tonight with the help of Grace and Sara.  I thought they were my friends.  I don't see them wearing dresses.  Mother says my legs are too short for the pants and shorts, so I will have to be a dress kind of girl.  I don't think I like this......

X


June 14,2009

Senor Free Range returned last night,  His flight was very late, but that was okay - the red sox played 13 innings last night to beat the Phillies, so we were entertained.

Anyway, Free Range Bill (FRB) is a softie.  I think he will crack and drop my sentence. Mother says I must be good another 10 days before I come before the parole board.  I hope Senor Softie is on the board because I know I will be released early for sure.

But the real news is what a great day we had today.  My best girl friends came over today and we dressed up and talked and rubbed bellies for 2 hours. Then I got cranky.

Mother filled the pool and Cotton played grab a ball.  Reilly splashed and played drink the entire pool.  I must admit, I loathe water.  I love dirt, but do not want anything to do with water.  Mother made sure no one splashed me, so I did not melt or anything.  She says I will get used to it.  HA!

Now I am so weary I can barely keep my head up.  I am going to sleep good tonight I can tell you!

X



June 15, 2009

It was pouring rain this morning.  I hate water anywhere except in my water bowl.  I went outside and peed under a bush, but could not bring myself to poo.  Mother took me out twice, but here was water everywhere.  When we were getting ready to go out for the third time, I tried to push the living room fence out of the way, but it would not budge.  So I pooped on the hall rug right in front of Mother.  She scolded me and threw my little cropped tail butt out the door.  I sat sadly on the wet front porch while she cleaned up the waste zone.

When it stopped rainy, we all went for a long walk.  I was so dirty when we got home, I had to have a sink bath.  Now my hair is CRAZY like me.  

By the way, I was so tired after yesterday that I went back to bed and stayed there until 10:30.

X



June 16, 2009

One slightly used puppy, who used to poop under furniture but now poops on furniture, for sale.


June 17, 2009

Cotton locked me out!

I was doing a photo session of Xoco in the front yard.  Reilly was carrying on about the mailman and how life was horrible and beating on Cotton.  I put her in the powder room and proceeded to finish taking photos of Xoco. Cotton some how bounced up and hit the lock on the screen door thus locking us out.

I carried Xoco, in her dress, over to Miss D's to see if she had a back door key to my house  She had a key to the old kitchen door, but the screen door on that door is hooked closed because Cotton can open it.  

Then I went to J and P's.  They have front door keys, but no back door keys. At this point I can hear Reilly getting really angry for being in the powder room for 20 minutes now.  

J and P had a key to our next door neighbor's house and I knew they had a back door key as it is the easiest lock for the girls to use when they come and play with the dogs.  So I go into the neighbor's house and I do not remember where they keep the extra keys and I do not even have my cell phone to call and ask and P and J do not have their cell phone numbers either.  I felt horrible looking through kitchen drawers but finally recalled the keys in a small bowl.  

Hooray - they have the key I needed.

Now Reilly is literally howling mad.  Xoco is sick of being carried around in a dress.  And Cotton is confused why his mama is running around the neighborhood.

I got in at last.  Cotton was so happy and Reilly was more than a little put out!

 One does not need thumbs to lock his mama out.

Ellen


June 18, 2009

I have been such a good girl about pooping outside today, that I decided to give myself a little treat. What is the matter with eating three helpings (or more) for freshly made boiled hamburger and rice mixed with cooked vegetables. It is all good for you!  And all I had to do was hop onto the back of the chair and up onto the counter (remember I used to be in a Mexican circus, so hopping onto chair backs is nothing to me).  And the temperature was just right.  

If only I had not let my name tag hit the side of the pot I would still be enjoying this feast.

So now I am not allowed to do anything but think about my crimes.  I hate my life.

Xoco the unloved



June19, 2009

I am so weary today.  I have done nothing but sleep and nap and been dragged on the longest walks through pouring rain ever.  No one told me we would be living in the rainforest. I should have remained wild and free on the hot DRY streets of New Mexico.  I feel slime mold growing on my skin, which has not been dry in days.  They drag me through ponds and rivers that are 2-3 inches deep.  I smell like, like, dare I say it, a wet dog.

I can get off the counter now on my own now.

X


June 20, 2009

I am quadruple grounded

Mother is leaving to go get more baby gates.  I am grounded until I am dead at this point.

Exhibit A:  I pooped once and peed twice on the guest bed.  Reilly thinks it is her space, so I was letting her know otherwise.  Mother had to wash every last thing on the bed.  She was not happy.

Exhibit B:  Now I really thought I was being polite about this one.  Really. Shuck started calling at 4 am sharp.  Ugh.  Mother got up and closed the bedroom door and put a pillow over her head.  I snuggled in against her cheek and somehow we fell back to sleep.  Mother looked so peaceful sleeping there that I decided to get up and use the bathroom all by myself at about 5.  I pooped and peed on the bath mat and slipped right back into bed without disturbing anyone.  

So, no sleeping in the big bed and free time out in the house unless I have pooped and peed outside and then only with adult supervision.  This is really cramping my style.  Reilly is delighted with this new treatment.  She says I was getting too big for my britches.  I will show her that I can be miss prissy perfect too!  Just you wait and see.

X


June 21, 2009

Well, I was pretty good yesterday.  apart from pooping and peeing on the bath mat.

I got a bit of pig ear yesterday afternoon that I buried over and over yesterday. It  was gorgeous by the time I was done with it.  Mother cuts the tip off a pig ear for me and left the rest on the counter (Cotton and Reilly each got half of another pig ear that they ate in 5 minute flat).

I walked and pooped and peed outdoors, which is really rather dull.  After a long walk at 8, Mother was feeding the birds. since she has to go up and down the stairs to change their water, the gates were not up and I was playing and running around and around the house.  She saw me run like a flash by her with a toy in my mouth and I dove under the chair in the tv room.  Cotton tried to give me away.  When mother was done with the birds, she investigated.  I guess I should not have cussed at her.  I squirmed further under the chair and then under the side table, but mother can move the furniture and she caught me red pawed with the other bit of pig ear, from the counter, in my mouth.

I was immediately sent to bed in the box.  I had to sleep there all night. I was so very, very sad.

And now it is raining.

I hate my life.

X


June 22, 2009

I dare say that all of this "behaving well" is going to affect my diary entries.

How can I have any spice saying "I behaved well today.  All day."?!!?  

Where is the fun is writing "I did not once get on the counters to find food"?

Who will laugh at "I pooped out doors despite the rain today"?  

This is completely ruining my reputation as bad ass puppy.  

The only power I seem to have left is my diminutive size and "the stare". The stare is where I stand, paws turned out and ears at full height, and stare blankly at someone.  No one can resist "the stare".  But how long will it's power last?  Will I be forced to retire "the stare" as well as my repertoire of bad behavior?

Woe is me.

X


June 23, 2009

Life is far too dull around here.  I have a new hobby.

The Super X


June 24, 2009

I was pretty good yesterday until Free Range Bill (FRB) ignored me for too long.  

Mother had to go to another town meeting and I got left to keep an eye on FRB.  He is so much trouble.  I played and ran around and did everything I could to distract him from his computer.  But he would not budge.  So I had a little accident in the dining room.  No poop involved.  But FRB forgot to put the gates up and I got to make my own decisions.  So I don't consider this one my fault.  

Bijou, ask your lawyer dad if I have a case.

X



June 25, 2009

It is not raining, but the sky is full of thick, heavy clouds, just sitting there and waiting for me to come outside to pour down upon my little body and beat me into the asphalt as I am forced to poop in public, but I digress.

Mother furmenated each of us today and then put us in a 6 foot deep pool of water.  I thought torture was illegal.  I now have hair sticking out every which way.  I am atrocious.  I am trying and trying to find a place to hide my portion of chew bone, but no one will let me outside to dig.  And I can not get into most of the rooms due to closed doors or gates.  I thought this was the land of freedom and opportunities.  This just plain sucks right now.

My grandmother in NM says they had a family visit who had seven boys ages 4 months to 13 years old.  Grandmother in NM says that those seven boys were better behaved than when the three of us dogs come to visit.  How could that be?!!?

FRB has closed the door to his office and is being very quiet.  I get worried when he is very quiet in the house.  He could be plotting something. I will have to go check on him.

X



June 28, 2009

My life is so hard.

They say I am a dwarf and then they say I look like a troll.  Pick one.  I need an identity.  

Mother made a little purple troll smock for me - she could stand a sewing lesson or 10.  She is really dreadful when it comes to sewing.  She says that trolls do not have clothing with fine needle work.  A cloth sack has better workmanship than my troll smock.

And the hair.  Good lord what is she thinking.  Ha ha ha.  Laugh at the expense of the little puppy.

The good news is I have four gold stars in a row on the calendar.  I watched mother put them on tonight.  Only 10 more and I get my very own mini.

Xoco is a good girl.



June 29, 2009

Xoco peed on the guest bed sometime yesterday afternoon.   The room had been closed until about 1 pm when I opened the door in preparation for the arrival of our guest, Carol.   Carol discovered  a damp spot last night , but was so weary she did not tell me and covered it with an extra blanket. Ugh!

Xoco is in jail in the pantry until a non partial jury can be found to hear her case.  Not even the powers of good lawyers like Bijou's dad and our friend Jim combined can save her bad little furry butt today.

And she lost her gold star!

Very Mad Mother


July 2, 2009

What can I say?  

I  am  B-O-R-E-D!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It is like this.  I no longer have the option of pooping and peeing in the house, so I need an outlet. I love chewing card board.  Toilet paper rolls have cardboard tubes in the center.  All I have to do is remove the pesky paper from the roll and take the card board off the hook on the wall and viola!  I have exactly what I want.

Mother says I am going to have to start paying for all of the toilet paper I am wasting!!!!!!!!!!!  Silly mother.  Puppies do not have any money!


X

July 3, 2009

We had a fun sleep away last night.  We went all the way down the hall to the guestroom!  It was like camping, I think.  I am not sure because I have never been camping.

Mother hopes that by all sleeping in  the guestroom, I will learn to love and respect the bed and not pee on it.  I certainly did not pee on it last night and slept like a little angel until 7 am.  But the guest room bed is small.  We have a BIG bed in our room and this is only a double bed, so three dogs and one mother made it a little bit crowded.  Especially since I simply can not be touched by anyone while I sleep or I growl.  

I have not been a bit bad in the house for FOUR whole days now.  I do not consider taking toilet paper off the roll bad, by the way.  I have discovered that when mother is in the shower is the best time to start letting it rip.  Toilet paper rolls conveniently make no noise and I only get found out when I start to get excited and talk.

Speaking of talk, mother says I need "speech therapy".  She said she had it as a child for a lisp.  She feels I need it because I talk like Cotton and he has no idea of how he sounds!  Mother says her speech therapist gave her colored marshmallows as a treat for doing well.  I have never had a marshmallow - maybe I should give this speech therapy a try.

Gotta rest up now.  Bread and Butter Bill is coming home from Vermont this evening.  He has been trying to sleep in a tent this week.  Silly Bill.  It rained hard ALL week.  I will let him sleep with me tonight.  That will help him sleep good.

X


July 6, 2009

Ha ha ha Reilly.  

Reilly wet the bed!!!!!  Two nights in a row!!!!!  Guess you are not so perfect now!!!!!

I don't wet the bed.  I wake up and pee on the bed.

After the Hottentots tried to invade the place Saturday night (know one paid a bit of attention to all of the explosions except me),  
I got up at 1:30 and peed at the very end of the bed where it would not bother a sole.  Bill felt his feet get cold.  Boy did I get tossed into the box double fast for that.  Mother and Bill stripped the bed and got all comfy.

I couldn't see what happen next because someone put his robe over the box so he could not see my sad face, but I heard a lot of "Oh Reilly"  from the big bed an hour later.  Turns out she drank too much water in the swimming pool and was still processing it.  She peed in her sleep in the bed.  Now that is so gross.

Free Range Bill went down the hall to the guestroom to sleep.  Reilly was sent to the pantry.  Only Cotton got to stay in what remained of the big bed with mother.

Then she did it again Sunday night.  What is up girl friend?!!?  She has to have an examination tomorrow by the vet.  I told her not to expect any stiff drinks, but a lot of poking.  She is not so good at the vet as me and Cotton.  

Oh and FRB, that silly man, took the fence down to the living room.  Lets just say that no fence + a huge thunder storm = Xoco poop in the living room.  I guess he just will not learn.

X

July 8, 2009

Did you know we have TWO bathrooms on the same floor and they each have rolls of toilet paper
hanging from the wall!??!

Xoco the very excited Explorer


July 10, 2009

Well, it turns out Miss Prissy Perfect Reilly is a "nervous" pee'er.  Her bed wetting and excessive water drinking are just from being too up tight.  Like they really needed to do a blood test to tell us that!??!  Geesh. I am convinced she is just doing this to get more attention.  Mother and FRB have been doting on her for the last few days.

NO ONE DOTES ON ME WHEN I PEE IN THE BED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This just blows!

Now mother is taking her "special girl" to a town meeting and I have to stay at home with the boys.  Everyone knows I am the one who goes to meetings.  This calls for a revenge poop somewhere in the house.

Angry Xoco



July 14, 2009

I AM FREEZING TO DEATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

For some reason we have decided to vacation in the Arctic Circle this summer.  Yes, every little Mexican wants to go on a cold weathered trip away from all of the comforts of home.

Mother says we are only in the Adirondacks, but I swear I saw a polar bear here.

We are sleeping in a cabin with no heat or insulation.  There are four blankets on the bed and Cotton keeps hogging them.  The bath water comes straight from the lake.  Did I mention that the lake is like 20 degrees cold and feels awful when a little girls gets too excited and bounds off of the dock and falls into the lake?!!?  Free Range Bill says "this is fun!".  That man is muy loco!

Bijou, send winter clothes, asap!

I want to go home.

Xoco the ice cube


Xoco’s camp diary July 10-17, 2009

My, that was an adventure. A whole week, in the Adirondacks, (I still think we were in the Arctic) with Free Range Bill’s family. Boy do I have stories to tell!!!!!!

Now remember, I am just a little Mexican, so I can only see things at ankle level, but even down here there is a lot going on.

We arrived Friday after a long winding car ride. Did anyone remember that the little Mexican gets car sick while riding in her box on winding roads?!!? I made it without loosing my lunch, but I was a mite bit green. And the ferry ride across Lake Champlain was quite nice when mother held me and let the fresh lake air blow in my face.

Cotton and Reilly had been to this camp before, so they knew what was what. It was all new to me and FABULOUS. Pine needles to eat. Dirt all over the place just begging to be dug into. And CHIPMUNKS! A prey animal I could have some fun with. And one was living under our cabin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If they would only have taken me off my leash…..

Then people started to arrive. Grandmother arrived with her oldest granddaughter, J, and a BABY! At last! A human in my size range. And babies are a delicious collection of smells and tastes. I could have licked him all day. Then more people arrived. Senor Bill’s bro with his wife and three kids and dog, Bella. Everyone noticed the cute puppy as they should. I told Bella my rules and then we were friends.

We got ourselves settled into our cabin, which had two bedrooms and a bathroom, and then we had a cook out. We were all pretty pooped and headed to our cabins shortly after dinner.

You wouldn’t think people would be up for this, but Saturday morning mother took Aunt C, 2 of her children, and Grandmother yard sale shopping. Cotton got to go to as he loves mother far too much and is a pain while she is out. They found all kinds of stuff and I got a tiny t-shirt, which got a major make over later in the week. Reilly got nothing! Cotton got a coronet and tennis balls and plush toys and a cowboy shirt– I wonder who mother’s favorite is?????

Mother was impressed with Aunt C. Aunt C is a professional yard sale shopper! At one stop they came to a home that did not have much to live on or even sell, but the children were selling toys to make money for summer camp. Aunt C bought toys for 4 times what they were priced. Aunt C is way nice!

When mother returned, she put my life vest on me and we went down to the lake for swimming lessons. Mexicans do not float. At least not this one. Even with my buoyancy device, I was sinking like a rock. I did not mind swimming too much but heat up the lake next time. I think I hit my head on an iceberg. Cotton loved the water and Reilly rode on her raft with the help of cousins V, and A, and we all had a great old wet time. When I got out of the lake, I ran like a mad dog and dove into the sand and pine needles. Now that felt good.

Later that day more people came. R and M and their two children and dog, Ruby, came from Chicago. Then B and J, parents of the other J, came from NC with the other J’s husband D. There were 16 people plus one baby and 5 dogs. Camp was complete.

It was partly cloudy Sunday, but we had good long walks and fun in the lake. Mother made us dress up for a photo shoot. Father helped. He does not care for this stuff, but he listened to mother, just like the rest of us. Mother has us all well trained for photo shoots.

The other J and her baby came often to my cabin to play with me. Baby L loved me except when I stuck my tongue up his nose. But boy oh baby boy was he tasty! All of the other kid cousins soon discovered that our cabin was rocking with dog fun. M and K came many times a day to play. And I never once lacked someone to walk me. Cousin A even ran with me a few times. I think I may be as slim as Reilly now.

We had a couple of rather cold days with lots of rain too. Our cabin had NO insulation or heat. And us puppies were not allowed in the great room with the fireplace. Of course mother abandoned us and went to Lake Placid and Starbucks with Aunt M one cold day. So not fair. My countless cousins came and played with me, but I think I got frostbite.

Everyone had a good laugh when I got so excited at Cotton swimming that I leapt off the dock that afternoon. Ha ha ha. Everyone laughed at the little puppy dressed up in the ridiculous outfits mother put on me. Ha ha ha. And I am so NOT channeling Yosemite Sam even though mother insists I am.

Our last couple of days was much better weather. I got to go canoeing! Mexicans can float well if they are in a boat! I got so brave I even looked over the side of the canoe! Cotton and Reilly had been canoeing so many times before they looked bored. But for me it was thrilling.

Mother got really brave and swam across the lake with Aunt B and her daughter J. That was way too far for the sinking Mexican. And of course Cotton swam daily and Reilly splish splashed.

In the evenings, the people all gathered up at the dining room. Each family took turns to make a special dinners. Uncle B and Aunt M made some good smelling meat and gave each family a jar of the “rub” they used on it. New Rule: never stick your nose in a jar of rub!!!!!!

Aunt C bought special soaps and dyes and everyone made tie dye t-shirts. This is where my tiny t got its make over. Cousin K did an AWESOME job on my tiny t. Mother said she could drop out of elementary school and make a fortune on her tie-dyes. Mother also says I look like a hairy hippie chick in my groovy t.

Cousin M was my main man during camp. He played with me and walked me and I think he was tempted to steal me and take me home. That would have been fun – then I could live with Ruby and we could wrastle all day and every day. Cousin’s M’s mom is crazy about her camera too, so I would have fit into their family just fine.

Now I am home. Mother scrubbed all of us doggies. She said we smelled horrible. I must nap now and dream about all of the adventures that we had all week. I loved all of my cousins and Aunts and Uncles and Grandmother and wish they would send me presents!

Very Weary Xoco


July 24, 2009

Xoco is so busy girl. 

First, I had to sleep for two days, just to catch up after all that fun on vacation.

Then I had to go on a tear. Literally. I had to tear things up. Toys to unstuff, tissues to chew, and toilet paper rolls to find and destroy.

Now I can concentrate on my writing.

As of this day, I have had SIX gold star days in a row. Not an accident or intentional poop or pee in the house to be found! Xoco is good girl. Mother calls me the pee-meister now because I love to pee outside and mark my territory just like Cotton and Reilly. But watch out for Cotton, he will pee right on a little dog if she stands too close.

And Father has hung a little bell, four inches above the floor, by the front door that I am supposed to ring when I want to go out. Excuse me, but I would rather have a button to press. And no jolly little ding a ling sound, but a button that would open the door for me and drop biscuits at my feet. Now that is something I might consider cooperating with!

Xoco the good


July 25, 2009

Yes, I have let myself go. I just can not live with this pressure. After six days of being good, I feel I deserve a break from the routine.

And I am a working girl and two photo shoots in one day is more than I can take. Especially when I am forced to wear a fairy princess outfit complete with tiara. Please, I hate frills. I must have a way to express myself. Reilly and Cotton can poop outdoors all they want. I say go for it, the lawn is all yours. But I need privacy and a wool rug. I now admit that using the guest bed was not good judgement on my part, but what is wrong with the floor? The poop is so well concealed in the patterns of the oriental rugs, that no one will notice and mother is very good about checking the rooms daily.

And as for ringing the little bell by the front door, what-ev-er!!!!!!!

Xoco the pooper

July 31, 2009

I
have been perfectly behaved lately. 

Really unexciting actually. 

Nothing much to report, really. 

Except for the very fantastic fact that I can now carry a full size tennis ball in my mouth!  And run with it.  And fetch it.  And bring it back to mother when asked.  It is quite thrilling to run with the big dogs now.  And I have a tactic to get them to drop the ball if they get it before me.  I circle behind them and bite them in the lower hind leg.  One good nip and they tend to jump and drop the ball.  I made the mistake of trying this on mother and I got a huge scolding when I bit her calf.  Oops.  I have to learn to gauge my audience a bit better.

Xoco the athlete


August 2, 2009

Oh please.  Give me a break.   Xoco is becoming unbearable.

First off, my daddy and I were playing tug and toss with a toy. I do not get to play with him on my own much because Cotton usually busts in on the game. But today mother was keeping Cotton occupied elsewhere. I was having a wonderful time with my daddy until Xoco showed up. I did not let her play so she barked and barked and barked as I tried to ignore her and play with my daddy.

Then we had a photo shoot. Mother had a gorgeous sun dress picked out for me. It was a simple white cotton with pink dots in various shades all over it, a high waistline and a full skirt. It fit me perfectly and as mother was adjusting my straps, Xoco climbed into mother’s lap and wanted a sundress too.  

Like Xoco’s Aztec build would look good in a sundress!??!  

Mother had a little halter-top sundress in white and red for Xoco. Mother had to buy it at Build-a Bear because Xoco can’t fit into real clothes. I thought I would die right there on the spot. Xoco wears clothes made for toys! And then she pranced around as if she looked good.  She is sooooo vain!

Really, what do people see in that dwarf??????????

Sgt. Princess Reilly Reed


August 5, 2009

Mother says I got in a week’s worth of trouble all before 8 am and I think she is right. It has not been a good day!

First off, Bread and Butter made us get up at 5:20 am. He had to jet off to Santa Fe, land of enchantment and all that. I need more than a couple hours of sleep, so I was not very awake when mother dragged me and Reilly (she likes to sleep late too) out for a walk at 5:45. Yes, I peed and pooped outside. Mother then took B&B off to the airport. He says he has to travel so much to keep food in our bowls and that us dogs is a very expensive hobby. Honestly, I hardly eat a thing!

Any old way, while mother was out, I learned to “dumpster dive” as Cotton calls it. I can just barely reach stuff in the trashcan if said trashcan is more than half full. So I occupied my spare time by pulling tissues out of the can and shredding them. Then I went down the hall and pulled the toilet paper off the roll in the guest bathroom. I was very, very busy for the 40 minutes mother was gone.

But wait, there’s more. Mother returned and scolded me for the mess I had made and had me “help” her clean it up. Then we went for a walk. When we got home, at 7:30, I realized I still needed to poop and….you guessed it. Love the feeling of a wool rug under my little furry bottom! Mother said she is going to put my bed and water bowl in the powder room forever because I am never going to be allowed to leave.

After hours in solitary, I was freed.

Mother took Cotton to the basement to play ball and I followed. Did you know we have a rumpus room in our basement just for dogs? It is great. There is a long straight run way and at the end a pile of pillows to crash into. I love it and so does Cotton. We played ball and I was being a tad bit annoying. I kept nipping at his heels as he ran for the ball and after about the 15th ball Cotton lost his temper. He grabbed me by the back of the neck, threw me down onto the floor, and yelled at me. I screamed and cried and was very scared. Mother signed “no more” and Cotton let go. Then he marched around the basement two full circles before he came and apologized to me. Mother looked at my neck. It was wet, but no marks on it. She said I deserved what I got and hope that I would remember this little lesson.

I hid under the bed until about 9 am when mother came and found me. I have been very respectful all day. Cotton and I had a quiet wrastle at noon, but I have tried hard not to get too into his face.

It is very hard being me.

Xoco, the contrite


August 12, 2009

Why is every time I do something new, I get into trouble?

Like today.  Mother has put all of the toilet paper out of my reach, so I had to find something else to do.  I spied a plant in the living room that could be fun.  Now we all know I have spent much time in the living room, but this plant never caught my attention until today.  According to mother, they have had this plant for 20+ years and it has survived countless pet birds and other creatures.  

I didn't kill it.  

I just gave it a buzz cut.  All of those lovely hanging down vines and leaves were just begging for a little dog to tear them off and shred them.  Mother says it was an impressive mess as she hauled my fuzzy bottom off to jail.

Someone suggested I be tested for ADHD as I am always in trouble.  Like I have time for a silly test.

Busy, busy Xoco


August 13, 2009

FRB has been having the best trip ever. He has been in Santa Fe, my adopted home town, for a week! He even missed mother's birthday, but that is another story completely.

Anyway, he has been dealing with MICE in the house in Santa Fe. The tenants say they are everywhere and according to Bill, on closer inspection, they are indeed. And for some reason the tenants dog, Rosa the airdale, has not been catching them like a good terrier should!  Oh man, me and Reilly would have the mouse situation sorted out in one or two days tops! So Free Range Bill has been caulking holes and dropping moth balls here and there. The tenants have been setting traps and keeping all food stored away and it appears to be working. 

BUT WILD MICE TO BE HAD FOR FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Gracious, my little heart just gets a going at the thought of it.  And Reilly is mad as hops that her daddy will not be bringing her a real live mouse back from NM.   I asked if he did bring one, would she share it with me and she just growled at me. I would share, I bet. 

Cotton says he doesn't care because he has his mama and as acting man of the house while Bill is away, that is all he needs. 

Cotton is such a wuss.

By the way, I am writing this while in my box. I was up for 10 minutes and pooped in the living room.  What can I say, it is raining outside.

Xoco the would be mouse hunter if she ever got a chance


August 21-28

Sorry to be so behind, but I have had a lot to process in the last week. Reilly tells me to stop with the psycho babble, but I have been to Adult Summer Camp and that is all I heard! That and a few bad words that mother says I may not use online!

It was a wild week and I was calm compared to some campers, whose names I will refrain from mentioning, but whose intials are JTB the 1/3. It started out quiet enough, but then people starting showing up and it got crazier and crazier. I do not even know how to explain it all except to say that by canoe trip time Thursday, I was driven to throw myself from a boat, but I will explain more later.

It all began Friday August 21st. Mother had put Cotton’s little red car in the back of the big car to bring to camp. Cotton sat in his car while we drove through New Hampshire and Vermont. When we came to the ferry, Cotton drove his car onto the deck and rode across Lake Champlain on his own. I was so embarrassed to be seen with my family.

At camp, we got a different cabin this time. It was in the middle of all of the other cabins and very spacious with two rooms. While Senor Bill and mother unpacked, Cotton snuck out in his car and brought back two kegs from the gas station 4 miles down the road. Mother was so mad, she took his fake id away. I don’t know what happen to the kegs, but my guess is the rest of the campers consumed them during the week, given the amount of laugter heard each night!

Saturday morning was dedicated to food shopping. Every meal was like Thanksgiving, Reilly explained to me. 14 people can certainly put away a lot of grub. So Bread and Butter and mother shopped and shopped and filled their car to the brim with provisions. And it still was not enough. Goodness, I only get ½ cup of food per day. I have never seen so much food available. I really must get out more.

Us five pretty much had the camp to ourselves Saturday afternoon. Mother swam across the lake and Free Range Bill paddled along side her in the row boat with us dogs, with Cotton crying for his mama the whole time! FRB decided he wanted to swim across the lake too, so he swam back while mother paddled us dogs. I really should buy FRB a swim suit. That evening, a few people wandered into camp. By Sunday, everyone had arrived.

Monday morning, and each morning during the week, the “campers” did stretches. Us dogs opted for a walk in the woods with mother. I was having a great time until Reilly started calling me “the bait dog” and saying it was my job to lure any predators away from her and Cotton. By the end of the walk, I had what is left of my tail between my legs and begging mother to carry me. It did not help that there was a coyote lurking about the woods too.

After eating HUGE breakfasts every morning, the campers learned to stalk. I am just a little Mexican, but let me tell you, it was like watching a herd of cattle trying to tip toe through the forest. If you want to learn to stalk, watch Reilly. She is the most awesome huntress on the planet and she does not make a sound. And not one of the campers had their noses to the ground, so how could they really be stalking?!!?

The afternoons were dedicated to long walks, canoeing, napping, reading, and swimming. Mother swam across the lake and us dogs followed, along with fully clothed FRB, in the row boat each day. I wore my Personal Flotation Device in case of emergency evacuation. Cotton and Reilly do not need PFDs as they swim beautifully. I can swim, but I sink as I am doing so. Besides, Reilly insisted that if the coyotes saw me fall over board, they could swim out and eat me up. Reilly makes me worry.

The evenings were full of laughter and bawdy stories, so I heard. Mother was unwilling to wear a wire while at dinner and I was not allowed in the dining room, so I don’t know exactly what was said, but we could hear lots and lots of laughter each night as we stayed in our cabin, alone. There was some mention of boating and cougars, but I don’t know the details and mother says I am too young to understand.  And every night mother returned to the cabin smelling of s'mores!  And not just any s'mores, but dark chocolate and home made marshmallow s'mores.  And she did not bring one to me, ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Some days it just does not pay to be this cute.

The weather was beautiful this week too. Warm days and cool nights. We all cuddled under the blankets to keep toasty at night and listened to the loons crying.  It was very peaceful and wonderful.  Except for the coyotes.  And raccoons.  One night a raccoon came and took mother's empty Starbucks cup off of the porch and then a fight started up in the woods.  Somewhere there is a family of raccoons with their very own Starbucks cup!

On Thursday we went on a canoe trip with just about everyone. I was designated bow dog. People fought to have me in their canoe because I was such a good bow dog. I did not mind this too much, but JTB the 1/3 kept talking and talking and talking while I was in his canoe. I swear he was using up all of the air. After an hour of this, I checked to see if my PFD was securely fastened and that I had my id tags. Then I flung myself from the bow of the boat and started swimming to shore as fast as I could. I was willing to take my chances in the wilderness before I had to listen to more of his stories. Unfortunately, a leash was attached to my PFD and they wheeled me in like a big hairy fish. So NOT cool!

Friday mother made us get up very early and get dressed for a photo shoot. We had three dogs, two canoes, four people, and one little car with which we headed into the morning mists. Mother had scouted out the perfect place for our final photo for the new calendar. It was very pretty, but it was a bit scary. Our car was on a tiny bridge over a canal in the middle of no where. I sat very, very still in my pink ultra suede jacket complete with faux pink leopard print color. Reilly and Cotton did well too, but I know I was the best.

And then Saturday came and we had to head home. FRB put blankets in Cotton’s car and I rode home in the way back with Cotton, resting in his car. I could actually see out the windows when sitting in his car, so I did not puke. I was a weary little dog and very happy to see my own home again and all of my toys. I had the best times at camp, but I also have lots of questions. I hope we get to go back again next year and have more exciting adventures.

By the way, can some one please tell me, how do you get a nun pregnant?

Xoco Reed, age 11 months


September 4, 2009

It is really mother's fault!

I was only outside for like three hours. I swear if I had been out for 3 hours and 15 minutes, this would not have happen. But mother made me come in so she could go to the post office. She did make certain i had peed before entering the house. But she didn't make me poop. So while she was out, I pooped in the living room. 

She knew immediately I had done so when she returned. 

I hid while she located the pile. 

Then she tried to find me. 

When she took the poop to the powder room to be flushed, I was already there, pondering the meaning of my life.

Xoco who knows what she is doing


September 15, 2009

I am the most popular girl in town!

Everyday the children come home from school at 3:00. At 3:05, little children up and down are street start to holler, “where’s Xoco”. When I come out, it starts a riot. Children squeal with delight at the site of my cute little self. They would rather walk me than have a snack!!! 

Can you blame them? My adorableness is legendary. Everyone is polite to Cotton and Reilly, but it is just because I have asked them to be so. 

Each afternoon I let the little children walk me up and down the street, careful to give each one a turn. Sometimes they fight over the chance to be my friend. I am good though.  I try to give everyone the attention they deserve. 

 But I do have a secret favored child…..

Xoco the popular


September 20, 2009

I am ONE year old now. 

Yesterday was XOCO DAY ALL DAY and I went from being a puppy to a big girl somehow. I still poop in the house, but I am not a puppy no more.

Anyway, we had a fiesta last night to celebrate this major event. We had about 20 guests and they brought me gifts. I have writer’s cramp from all of my thank you notes. We also had mariachi music, a piñata, Frito pie and tres leche cake. Everyone sang HAPPY BIRTHDAY to XOCO. And the party went on and on.

I got some tiny bones. I took one upstairs to hide for later, but Cotton found all of my tiny bones and ate them. I also got a tiny teddy bear, which the three year old from across the street took off with. And I got jammies and the most fearsomely awesome hoodie and bat wings. I am not thrilled about the bat wings. People giggle when I wear them. This makes me wish I had my fearsome hoodie on so I could scowl at them and make them quake with fright. I also got numerous bottles of wine and Mexican beer, which no one shared with me! It was MY party!

Anyway, I am starting a street gang now that I have my bad dog hoodie. It is called Xoco’s Locos. You must be afraid of nothing to be a member. And at least one year old. Want to join?

Gang Leader Xoco


September 24, 2009

Us three dogs are very sad today. Reilly has been curled up into a tight ball, staying mostly by herself. Cotton has his tail down. And I don’t want to play.

This morning our best grandfather passed away. He was very, very old and very frail. One of his legs didn’t work so good anymore and he was one month shy of turning 94. That is 13 or 14 in dog years!

Our dear grandfather was the best grandfather a dog could have. He sent us money! On our birthdays and for Christmas he sent each of us $10.00. He didn’t feel so good last week, so I did not ever receive a card with money from him, but Cotton and Reilly told me about the cards he sent. They always had a picture of a dog and little note to the birthday dog.

Besides the money part, we will all miss him for other reasons. Reilly loved him because he shared cookies with her. Cotton loved him because he had tennis balls on the feet of his walker, which Cotton never bothered but sure liked looking at. I loved him because he sat still and let me sit on his lap and snuggle him. The last time I saw him he told mother that she could leave the little one, meaning me, because he enjoyed me so much. 

And we all loved him because he had a big loving heart. And we dogs are excellent judges of big loving hearts.

I miss you grandfather.

The Little One


October 8, 2009

Sigh. 

My growth spurt has been and gone. 

According to the scale at the veterinarians’ office, I weigh 7.9 pounds. I am one year old and a dwarf. Senor Bill says we really should ask for some money back from the rescue organization from which I came because I am such shrimp. That is just plain mean. I found it very sobering to learn I was so small. I thought for sure I weigh 40-50 pounds. 

I think the scale must be wrong.

I went to the veterinarian today because Reilly had to have her annual exam. Did you know that Reilly has to wear a muzzle when she is examined!??! I found this utterly shocking. Mother says it is because Reilly had to have surgery twice for dog bites and she gets extra scared at the veterinarians’ office. I told mother she can never ever use Reilly as an example of “how to behave” to me again!

By the way, Reilly is in excellent health, even though she is mean as can be to the veterinarian!  Go figure.

Very Little, Little Xoco


October 22, 2009

For some reason, known only to himself, Free Range Bill cut my eyebrows off – COMPLETELY!

Yes, I know I have a unibrow when it gets too full, but leave the girl a little something. Right now all I have are eyebrow nubs. How  can I be expressive with nubs?!!?

And to top it off mother says she can’t feel my ribs, so she is putting me on a diet. She says I am a fat girl, with a mustache, and no eyebrows. 

This is a low, low point in my short life!

Xoco, aka gordita

Nov 2, 2009

Mother says I have gotten lazy about keeping up my journal. These short days seem to go by too quickly, especially when I take a four hour nap every morning. But I will try to do better.

I must comment on Halloween. My mother does not need any more encouragement to put me in stupid outfits. I am going to ban Halloween next year. First there was the big debate as to which costume I should wear – my bat wings or the hairy fairy. Fortunately my friends came through and voted for the bat wings, but that did not stop my mother from putting the fairy costume on me and stuffing me into a pumpkin! Do I look like I am happy??????

And then this whole trick or treat thing. I got NOTHING! I found all kinds of treats, but everyone kept taking them away from me. And Mother and Senor Bill gave away our candy! Excuse me, but that is just wrong.

Thirdly, there is the day after Halloween. Is it just me or are the children in the neighborhood crazier than usual?!!? No one was safe from the wrath of the sugared up little children. One three year old looked at Senor Bill’s shoes and told him “those are girly shoes” right to his face! I have examined the offending shoes and found them much too big to be girly shoes. They look more like Danish troll shoes to me.

And not to tease or anything, but I may have exciting new to share in two days time... Keep reading to find out what it could be.

Xoco, who is up to no good

November 8, 2009

It has been some day.

First I had to get up at 3 am so Mother could take FRB to the airport. If I am awaken, I must poop and pee or there will be trouble. So out we went, looking both ways for the coyotes, and I pooped and peed like a good girl. Then I went back to bed while mother drove to the airport and back. Cotton joined me. Reilly waited downstairs.

When mother finally got back, we all curled up together and slept.

Then we got up, had breakfast, and walked to the bank and back. After that pleasant little jaunt, me and mother got in the car and picked up my BFF, Murphy, and her mom. We girls went shopping. And what shopper that Murphy is. She must have tried on 8 sweaters before we found the one that was just right. I got a darling black and white hounds tooth sweater - very classic. Murphy got a striped sweater. Mother felt compelled to purchase reindeer slippers for me. She is insane.

After shopping, we came home for lunch and some chores, but it was too beautiful to stay indoors today. At 2:30 we met Murph on the street and we walked the bike path towards Lexington. I hiked for 90 minutes with the bigger dogs and I have to say, my little feet are killing me. Not to mention the fact that I must be 10 pounds lighter from all of this activity.

Now I am waiting for my dinner to be served. Pip Squeak, the baby mouse Senor Bill rescued last night, and I eat the same things. It is amazing. Mother says that because he/she is my mouse, I must care for him/her. I like little pip Squeak. He/she is smaller than me and awful cute. Reilly and Cotton are bummed that they killed their baby mice. One should not be so hasty with one's actions, I always say.

Xoco


P.S.  About that announcement, I am just not ready to make it, yet......



November 15, 2009

I am enlightened.


Yesterday it rained and rained and rained. Water was gushing down the street like a river. Cotton could have gone white water rafting in it. We could have created hydroelectric power from the amount of water pouring down the road. Homes and villages were being washed away.


Mother says I am exaggerating, but there were PUDDLES! And it did rain all day.


But I have attained enlightenment and I asked to go outside, where I pooped in the rain, three times!


I am an excellent study of discipline.


I hope you can all become as good as me.


Ohm.



November 21, 2009


This is a really miserable day. 

It is Reilly’s ninth birthday and she keeps reminding me it is all about her. 

Ever since she got hired at that residential school as a therapy dog, she has been unbearable! I think the girls need therapy after she leaves them, as she is so fussy all of the time. And she has a special bag with her name on it full of treats and toys that only she gets to play with at her job. So not fair. 

And now I have to endure a tea party, wearing party dress, and act like I am so happy it is her special day.

At least there is cake.

Xoco, who has such a hard life


November 28, 2009




I HATE THE HOLIDAYS!



X



Dear Diary

The holidays are upon us and I have never been so busy. Or cold. Someone really should have warned me about winter in New England before I signed on with this gig. Mother bought me a pink faux snow leopard coat and makes me wear it when we go out. I do get a lot of compliments and mother says that not everyone can pull off wearing a pink snow leopard coat without looking trashy. I think this is a compliment.

And senor Bill brought a tree into the house. Mother put hanging things on it and a train around it. I LOVE the train. So much so that they had to take the train away. It was thrilling to see it zip around the tree. I could chase it and only got zapped once. Reilly broke the track by attacking the train and Cotton carried off the engine, so senor Bill banned the train. What a grinch! But the best part of all is all of the boxes under the tree. Cotton and Reilly say these are presents and we will get to open them someday. Cotton tries to open them every day, but mother tells him it is not the right day. I tried to carry off one to examine it and got caught. I guess I should not try to carry off the biggest box and then see if it will fit under the chair.

Cotton celebrated “Cotton Day” on December 12th. It marks the anniversary of when he arrived here with the family. It has been 6 years now. Because it fell on Hanukkah, he got a draydel and a Hanukkah dog toy and the best leather collar with silver and turquoise studs, ever. He is showing off his bling to everyone. Reilly says she is fine with it, but I know she is way jealous.

On the 13th, we had a holiday open house for friends and neighbors. There were so many cookies and treats to be had. Reilly parked herself in a chair next to the cheese table and did not move the whole night. Cotton trolled for treats from the guests. And I parked myself on Joe’s lap! Joe is my main man. He is the daddy of Murphy, my best friend forever. Joe knows how to sit still. When I go to Murhp’s house, I always take time to sit with Joe. And when he came to my house, I sat on his lap for almost 2 hours.

Now I am trying to keep up with the correspondence. Mother has asked me to write the family holiday newsletter. Please. We all know I am the writer in this family, but I do not think I can stoop so low as a mere newsletter. I do have my literary standards. Besides, senor Bill says he will not have his name signed to anything I have written. Excuse me oh mighty published author. I can at least edit my own stuff.

Holiday Xoco




Read Xoco's 2010 Diary




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